Counseling for Live In Relationship
Counseling for Live In Relationship – ETHOS HEALTH CARE.
Live in relationship is different. It has its own characteristics, benefits and difficulties. Societies around the world are still not very clear on how to react to such relationships. Reactions range from acceptance to rejection. Fortunately courts are more considerate. Women and children get almost same protection as that given under laws related to marriage.
Psychology of Live in
Why do people opt for live in relationship? Common reasons are:
- Not ready for marriage. Those who are in love or like each other but not yet ready for marriage. This includes those who are in relationship but not sure about depth of commitment.
- No marriage. Those who are not keen on marriage. Some people are averse to idea of marriage.
- Marriage yes but elsewhere. Those who love or like someone but due to certain factors know that they can not get married to each other and will marry someone else.
- Married elsewhere. Some times those already married but unhappy opt for live in with partner of choice.
- Just convenience. Sometimes it is based more on convenience as this relationship satisfies mutual needs. This may or may not include sexual need. Working people may find it difficult to find accommodation in hostel or as single and go for live in as if they are married couple.
- Mutual support. Sometimes necessity and compulsion bring two together. Many senior citizens too are using this option to spend evening of their life.
- Lets try. Some find it new and exciting to try once.
Whatever is the reason, this has become part of society. Like any other relationship this too has its share of good and bad times. This relationship has some factors which can further complicate the issues. Some are:
- No well defined structure or roles in relationship
- No well defined laws related to this
- Diverse social reaction to live in relationship
- Diverse expectations of live in partners
Some of the common issues that can cause conflicts and how counseling can help in this are:
Commitment – What should be the level of commitment? For some this should be as deep as in marriage for others the very purpose of live in is freedom. Counseling can help in understanding and resolving the expectation of commitment.
Money – Who will spend and how much? Is it ok if one bears all expenses? Money is one of the most important factors that can damage live in relationship. Ideally two must share equally the common expenses and must not expect charity. But there can be variation. Counseling will help you in resolving the matter with fairness.
Roles – Who will do what? There are daily chores and other works. Is it typically female for house work and male outside or equal share? How much one should help? Counseling will help you in understanding roles and how not to feel used by others.
Sex – Not every live in relationship has sex in it. Will it be there or not and how much? Does it mean no sex elsewhere? Such issues can be resolved in counseling to avoid any feeling of breach of trust.
Space – It takes two to tango. But how much? How much time we should spend together? Do we have our private space? These issues can be resolved in counseling.
Trust – How much one should trust? How should one deal with breach in trust? Is this a breakup or just over expectation? Counseling will help you in understanding the trust levels.
Relationship can be a beautiful asset or a deadly poison. It is you who will give it shape and color. Counseling can be of great help in giving it right shape and color.
