The matter given below is meant only for information and should not replace medical diagnosis or treatment of any condition.

Your horoscope and hands on your palm can indicate a lot about your sexuality. Palmistry and astrology can tell about the kind of sexuality you have as well as the kind of sexual problems you may face. One must understand two things. One, that these are only indicative. And second there are many factors in both palmistry and astrology. It requires a careful study of inter relation of these factors before reaching some conclusion. Do not jump to any conclusion only on the basis of one point.

Palmistry

Lines on your palm and your hand overall can reveal a lot about your sexuality. Some of the important factors equally applicable to love and sex are:

1. Type of hand – A gross heavy hand reveals gross energies. A square hand is practical, matter of fact type. A thin long delicate hand is more philosophical in attitude. Thin pointed hand is more artistic type.
2. Texture – Rough coarse texture can either be towards gross or physical energies. On the other hand soft and smooth reflects refined and more mental energies.
3. Color – Shift towards red reflects warm loving or hot temperaments and good vitality. Shift towards white or pale reflects lack of warmth and vitality. Yellow shift may reflect negativity of temperament.
4. Fingers – Thick fingers reflects love for indulgence. Spread out fingers reflects out going nature.
5. Mounts – Mount of Venus (at base of thumb) is the seat of love. For healthy sexuality it should be prominent but not excessively. Any crisscross of lines on this indicates uncontrolled sexual behavior. Mount of Moon (at outer edge of palm opposite Mount of Venus) is the seat of imagination and emotions. This can reflect your romanticism. Mount of Mars on the both edges of palm determines the state of vigor and vitality. When disturbed it can lead to state of aggressiveness in love and sex. Mount of Jupiter at the base of first finger determines wisdom and sanctity in sexuality. Mount of Saturn at base of second finger if disturbed can lead to infidelity. Mount of Sun at the base of third finger reflects magnetism and ability to attract others. Mount of Mercury at the base of little finger tells about mental and verbal sexual engagements.
6. Lines – Life line tells about health and vitality. Heart line reflects the state of emotions. It can tell about persons inclination and affects in the matter of love and sex. Brain line tells about person’s intellectual development. There can be small and minor lines, symbols or cross at different places which indicates good or bad effect. One line alone can not tell but a comprehensive palm study is required to reach some conclusion.

Astrology

Like said before, in astrology many factors are important and must be studied comprehensively before reaching any conclusion. Various elements of sexuality like vitality, libido, development of physique and sexual system, mindset of sexuality etc these all depends on combination of various factors. Since the horoscope of every individual is unique so is his or her sexuality.

Sexuality of a person mainly depends on:

• State of first and seventh house
• State of lords of first and seventh house
• Strength and position of Venus, Mars, Saturn and Rahu

Possible combinations for sexual disorders

• Afflicted venus, seventh house or seventh house lord
• Malefic stars in ascendant or Libra
• Weak and afflicted Venus in 7th house
• Afflicted Mars in 7th house
• Saturn and Venus in 8^th or 10^th house
• Afflicted Saturn aspecting seventh house
• Moon in Libra aspected by Mars, Rahu, and Saturn
• Saturn in the 6th or 12th house in a watery sign
• Saturn as lord of Ascendant aspected by Mars or Ketu.
• Ascendant associated with Rahu and Saturn.
• Rahu / Ketu and Saturn combine with the Moon.

Attitude

It is all in mind. Learn good sex skills, remain sexually confident and go with positive attitude.

Sexual Skills

No one is born with sexual skills. Get correct information about sexuality, learn sexual skills and develop sexual confidence. Do not aim to be a sexual super hero. It is idiotic to use pills to be one such. Be natural and have good sex in right proportion.

Fitness

Keep your fitness level high. It includes both mental and physical fitness. A dull mind or dull body can never have great sex.

Lifestyle

The importance of healthy lifestyle for good sex life can never be exaggerated. Organize your life with healthy habits and see your sex power rising.

Diet

Good diet can do wonders for high sex power. It improves health in general. In addition there are many food items like melons which enhance the sexual vitality.

Hypnotherapy

Hypnotherapy is in itself very useful in rediscovering your instinctive ability to have great sex. You have an easy interaction between your left and right brain functions and your creative mind comes to the fore.  Your powers of imagination and visualization are enhanced. hypnotic suggestion are given to you to heighten your sensitivity and your expectations and this is very important as well when you are looking for fulfilling, enjoyable and erotic sex. It is also helpful in balancing your libido with your partner.

Yoga

Yoga treats sex as the tool for the continuation of the human race and has a broader view on sex. There are several asanas which help in better sex. A sound mind and body is the foremost criteria for fulfilling sexual life and this is what yoga aims to attain through its asanas and breathing exercises. Following are some of the yoga poses which helps in improving better orgasm, enhanced energy levels and improved sexual power:

• Lotus posture
• Uddiyana Bandha
• Halasana
• Matsyasana
• Supine Pelvic Posture
• Viprita Karani
• Sarvangasana
• Sirshasana

Herbs

There are many very good herbs to increase sexual power & health of men & women. Some of them are discussed below:

• Ginkgo Biloba – It stimulates blood flow to the capillaries right below the skin which means extra sensitivity, extra sensation
• Ashwagandha – This herb boosts energy, reduces stress and has been shown to increase sperm count and the production of sex hormones
• Maca – This herb is used to increase libido, strength, stamina, and energy

Massage

Massage improves the strength of your sex power and helps you to long last in your bed with your partner.  It reduces stress, anxiety and depression. The various movements in massage therapy stretch the muscles, tendons, ligaments and fascia to improve blood circulation, stall muscular spasms and stimulate the nervous system.

Celibacy and Brahmcharya – The real meaning
There are many myths associated with the word celibacy and brahmcharya. Often celibacy is referred to as complete abstinence from sex. No wonder it is left for those who have renunciated world and their entire life is dedicated to spiritual development. It is seen as something impossible for common worldly beings. It is wrongly associated with preservation of semen. One, it gives the entire concept a wrong & narrow meaning. Second, it then can be meant only for men.

Brahmcharya is neither impossible nor it is useless for common people. On the contrary it is very crucial, very much possible and extremely useful for a very happy and successful life. It is the path of righteousness & self discipline where one gains control over impulsiveness in gratification of senses. It is easy to understand that most of the problems of today’s world are due to uncontrollable gratification of senses. There are many problems of physical and mental health due to this. Those who do not have sufficient control over senses find it difficult to create a meaningful life. Those who develop good self discipline, not only remains saved from problems but also are able to create a higher mission in life. And that is what human life is meant for.

The meaning of Brahmcharya is Brahm Charya which means LIVING A LIFE IN WHICH THE THOUGHTS, WORDS AND DEEDS ARE IN HARMONY WITH BRAHM THE SUPREME TRUTH. The core essence of this is self discipline of desires & senses. Since the sexual desire is a strong desire, a lot of significance and focus was given to it.

The discipline of senses does not need complete absence. In fact complete absence may not be the perfect way. Brahmcharya or celibacy is the attitude, the inner disciplined state.  It is equally applicable to both men and women. Both men and women can easily follow the path of brahmcharya or celibacy even with normal physical relationship. Brahmcharya or celibacy, discipline of desires and senses will lead to true love between the two and eliminate lust. Nature has given freedom to all to judge for them self what is due and what undue gratification is. Self discipline is your choice, the more you do it the more control you gain over yourself for a better life.

How to maintain celibacy

• Whether you are entering the priesthood or doing it for personal reasons, remaining celibate can be a difficult thing to do.
• Get involved in different hobbies; better not to be around many people you may be sexually attracted to for a while if this can be avoided
• Avoid temptation, especially at the start of this lifestyle.
• Avoid listening to others’ feelings about your decision, if they do not agree with yours.
• Try to find people who you think will understand you and your choices
• If religion is a part of your decision to be celibate, read the Bible or other religious book for guidance and strength.

Benefits of celibacy

• Avoid getting HIV or Hepatitis C, which can lead to death
• Reduce risk of other STDs such as herpes, gonorrhea, chlamydia, genital warts
• Reduce risk of unwanted pregnancy
• Reduce risk of marrying someone solely because of an unwanted pregnancy
• Reduce risk of abortion due to unwanted pregnancy, or giving up the baby for adoption due to lack of financial means
• Reduce risk of dropping out of high school or college due to an unwanted pregnancy; achieving one’s educational goals before getting pregnant

Harmful effects of celibacy

Although celibacy is not physically harmful, it may be destructive to a relationship if one partner makes a unilateral decision to stop sexual relations – whether due to illness, physical disability, interpersonal problems or sexual difficulties – thus imposing celibacy on the other partner. Celibacy may lead to psychological problems. They develop symptoms such as irritability, insomnia, somatization, or clinical depression.

Creating sexual conditions and situations

• Develop fit and supple body
• Cleanliness is must
• Create better conditions like soft music, dim or colored light, exciting clothing, comfortable room temperature, soothing room fragrance etc.
• Use new ideas, think something new. Not necessarily every time but at least to break the monotony.

Creating sexual mood

• Let there be no guilt in pleasure
• Give it due time in your busy schedule
• No distraction like TV internet games phones
• Connect with partner. Do not just think about your own satisfaction.
• Be comfortable. Sex is no barrier in your goodness as human being or your value system or spiritual growth.

Sexual communication and body language

• Be spontaneous
• Have rhythmic breathing and body motion
• Guide partner about what do you like but do not force
• Be affectionate
• Make inviting eye contact
• Frequently use touches, hugs, kisses

Learning about sexual and erotic zones

• Be aware of your body and sensations
• Explore own and partner’s body
• Massage each other
• Learn whole body sex not just genital sex

Sexual games and fun

• Enjoy and be playful
• Talk about sex, share jokes and lighter side of it
• Fantasize about sex and share with your partner
• You may try role play

Manage the challenges: Like all other aspects of life, it is necessary to work on challenges before you can have best of the experience. Common challenges to sexual satisfaction are :

• Failure in sex: There is no failure in sex. It is perfectly normal to not being able to enjoy or perform. Keep your mind calm and look for cause.
• Unrealistic expectations: The first challenge is to work on your expectations. Watching sex in media like movies, TV, Internet can flare up your expectations beyond reality. But when it does not happen in real life, one feels frustrated and may even look for ‘other’ options. Understand that sex in media is over glamorized and usually has no connect with real life. Once expectations are realistic, the experience is better.
• Conflicts: Psychological stress due to conflicts with your partner can never allow you to have good sex. Connect with your partner emotionally, resolve conflicts and have good sex.
• Boredom: Good sex demands novelty. And it is not necessary to change your partner for this. You may have new ideas, different place, different positions, different ways to add new feeling. Change your fixed mechanical routine.
• Different levels of sexual desire or libido: Not everyone can have same libido just like we have different hunger. Accept the difference. Work on the factors that might me affecting the desire like stress, poor health, hormonal changes, lack of sleep etc.
• Inhibitions and Fears: Inhibitions, fears, guilt, shame due to belief system or lack of awareness can prove a big hurdle.
• Pornography and Masturbation: If one is too much into pornography, his or her ideas of good sex may get motivated by that. This may not get fulfilled in real life. Masturbation may reduce the desire and need for sex leaving the partner unsatisfied.

Regular exercise can improve your bedroom chemistry. And this is how:

Sex is the game of brain, muscles, nerves, blood, hormones and skin. Exercise improves them all:

Body strength:  Good sex requires that you support your body or partner’s body for a significant time. And you need strength of muscles for this.

Flexibility:  Imagine sex without poses. So common sense that you need flexibility for good sex.

Stamina: Imagine that you have to tell your partner in between that you are tired. You want to stay long. So you need stamina.

Hormones, Blood Circulation and Nervous system: Exercise improves functioning with result of better sex.

Mood: Exercise improves alertness and mood.

Some of the common exercises that can pump up sex life are:

• Push-ups
• Squats
• Bench press
• Pelvic Tilts
• Lunges
• Ab Rolls
• Kegel’s
• Cardio

Healthy sex involves the conscious, positive expression of our sexual energy in ways that enhance self-esteem, physical health, and emotional relationship. It is mutually beneficial and harms no one. For healthy sex you should avoid sexual perversions and also you should have good relationship.

How to avoid sexual perversions

Sexual perversions are conditions in which sexual excitement or orgasm is associated with acts or imagery that are considered unusual within the culture. It comes in different forms. Some are simple and can be avoided as time goes by while the others when they develop into addiction can become disorders.

• Learn to have normal sex more often. This way, you are better able to satisfy yourself and your desires
• Do some exercise, take a bath or meet a friend so you can think of better things.
• Be committed to avoiding ideas and images that increase your lust. Observe yourself and then develop self-discipline.

Sex based on good relationship

Sex is supposed to make you feel good about yourself and about your relationship. Whenever we have sex, we should be attentive to each other’s pleasure. We should always have each other’s consent, and we should never use pressure to get consent. We should share in the responsibility of guarding ourselves and our partners against unintended pregnancy and sexually transmitted infection. And we should always be clear about what we want to do and respect what our partners want to do sexually. Some steps to help you make sex important in your relationship are:

• Make sure you actually care about your significant other
• Show your partner respect
• Make sex important in your relationship by making time for it
• Touch and kiss your partner often
• Play around and do fun stuff together
• Depending upon your partner’s temperament, surprise her/him.

According to research, humor ranks as one of the favorite when men and women are asked what they look for in a date.

What can humor do?

• Displays strength

Humor displays strength of personality. Ability to laugh over own deficiencies is considered as one of the strongest personality trait. A person with humor looks mature, self assured and in command of situation. But a negative humor like making fun of others shows inferiority.

• Creates bond

Humor is a great starter. It can help in creating instant bond. Research proves that funny people gain quick acceptance. People seek company of people who can make them laugh.

• Initiative

If used sensitively and intelligently, humor can play a good role in taking initiative. This is true for both initiating a relationship and initiating sexual encounter. Sexing the humor is an art that can be used as a teaser. It sets the process and communication in right direction.

• Releases stress

Humor releases stress. It can take away stress of life and revitalize to create good mood for enjoyable sex. It can also eliminate stress between partners and iron out differences.

• Reduces impact of negative

No human being is perfect be it you or your partner. There can be something in body, in habits, in mindset or other that can be little negative or put off. One can use humor cleverly to reduce impact of such negatives. Even during sex if some thing in your partner or some act is spoiling the moment, use humor to reduce its effect.

• Generates playfulness

Sex itself is a great play. Humor can enhance the playfulness. Humoring the sex is an asset that can create the best of the sex moments in the game of sex.

• Creativity

One of the complaint people make about sex that it has turned monotonous. Humor can help in creating newness, something fresh and enjoyable.

• Its naughty

Humor is naughty and so it can make sex naughty. This helps in creating more interest. Some people crave for naughty sex.

Be careful.

Remember to be careful with humor. Negative humor can put off your partner. Humor is an art; it requires novelty, originality, discretion and sensitivity to be effective. And you must know when to put humor in and when not. Honor the sensitive moments and emotions. Humor should not show you as someone frivolous, casual or insensitive.

Sex is all in mind. Good sex requires good mindset. Hypnosis can help in creating a better mindset for great sex.

Removes inhibitions and other negativity

Hypnosis helps by removing negativity from mind. It can be guilt, denial, inhibition, shame and other such negative emotions related to sex.

Past negative memories

Hypnosis can help by removing past negative memories like sexual abuse, poor sex etc.

Improves sexual confidence and performance

Hypnosis can improve sexual confidence and performance, a feeling of better sexual ability.

Improves libido

Hypnosis can enhance the libido and the urge to have good sex

Sexual fantasy

Hypnosis can help in creating sexual fantasy to spice up your sex life.

Normal relationship – Some people get too concerned about being in ‘normal relationship’. They develop rigid ideas about how a relationship should be. Anything different from that is unacceptable. Remember that even ‘normal’ has some variations. Do not compare with others. If the basics of your relationship like trust and sense of belongingness are fine then be happy, your relationship is good.

Perfect partner or relationship – Just like ‘normal’ some people get too rigid about ‘perfect’ partner or relationship. In such a state either they remain frustrated or try too hard to mould the other person. In both cases there are conflicts and disappointments. Focus on goodness of what you have instead of what you do not have. And the differences can be resolved through mutual cooperation.

Resolve conflicts – Conflicts are often common in relationships. Mostly these happen due to lack of skill to handle conflicts. Accept the conflict and develop openness to resolve it. Look for the cause of it. Then see how much each of you can help to make it better. Do not force solution on other person. If some of it remains then accept as part of life.

Communication – Communication should not be aimed at hurting your partner or proving your point but it should be directed to express your complaints properly and expected behavior.

Arguments – Arguments and blame game will lead to nowhere. They will only increase negativity. Instead of these develop conflict resolving skills and resolve the real disturbing issue.

Abusive relationship – If you are caught in an abusive relationship then avoid feelings like guilt or helplessness. Look carefully what is causing it. Do you have any contribution like not giving due respect to yourself. Work on the core issues. Help your partner to understand that it is detrimental for relationship. Gather courage and enhance your own position. Learn to keep yourself safe physically and emotionally.

Time – If you want to have a good relationship then it is necessary that you invest quality time into it.  Such time helps in creating better understanding and stronger bond. Both quantity and quality matters.

Intimacy – Do not equate intimacy with sex.  Being intimate is the feeling of closeness, oneness and deep affection.

Feel loved – Do not have any hesitation or guilt in your desire to feel loved. Keep your mind open to everyday small stimuli from your partner that makes you feel loved. It can be as simple as glance of eyes.

The romance – Not many people know the meaning of romance. Even less have the ability developed. It is a very fine subtle combination of emotions and activity that takes love to high spheres.

Togetherness – Togetherness is not just being physically together. It ranges from spiritual to intellectual to emotional and yes physical togetherness. The connect is the basis of meaningful togetherness.

Manage changes – Nothing is forever. Same is true for relationships. There can be changes due to work pressure, age, health, changing priorities. Love partners should be able to assess the changes and act sensibly to keep the relationship intact.

Why doesn’t he/she understand me? – This feeling can affect and spoil any relationship. It is not necessary that your partner is having any lack of interest in you. There can be other reason. Your communication may not be effective.

Affair – This can be the real test. If one partner is having an affair elsewhere. Very natural to feel hurt and insecure. Even then it is not necessary to end relationship bluntly. It may not be what you are thinking it to be or there may be some reason that can be rectified.

Dispel Relationship Myths – Get rid of common relationship myths.

• Argument is bad
• Opposite personalities attract
• We must do everything together
• There is no relationship without romance
• Sex is must
• We should agree on everything
• I will mould my partner to my choice
• Possessiveness proves depth of relationship

Work/Life Balance – Some forget work when in love and some forget love when too much occupied in work. A good life demands fine balance of two. In fact when in balance, both work and love can enhance each other.

Free time – Keep some free time for two of you which is free time, doing nothing. Spending free time together with no specific task in mind and away from TV phone and computer improves relationship. Like cuddling each other in bed can be a very satisfying moment.

Money – Be practical and sensible. True money should not be the criteria for love but money is crucial. Good money management has proved to be one major factor in having satisfying relationship.

Housework – Do not make it burden. On the contrary this can become a great way to show that you care and to have moments of togetherness and sharing.

The In-Laws – In-laws and other relations after marriage need to be managed in a way that they do not become interfering concerns.

Difference of opinion – One common mistake is to assume difference in opinion as an indicator of poor relationship. No two human beings can be exactly similar. Learn to accept and honor the difference in opinion.

Low self-esteem – Poor self esteem can be hindrance in having a good relationship. It affects ability to express and feel love.

Jealousy and Possessiveness – A sure way to kill the soul of relationship. Your partner will only feel suffocated and used.

Commitment – It is better felt than verbalized. Lip service assuring love, sincerity, commitment will fail to keep relationship going if not matched by gestures and attitude.

Illness – We all fall sick sometime or the other. It can be physical or psychological. And such are the times to show true love. Genuine support and care during such phase can create the strongest possible relationship.

Fertility issues and Children – Discuss the individual need when to welcome kids. In case of infertility look for various alternative options including adoption. Children need time and attention. Special caution is required to let the relationship active and alive during this time. Do not forget each other.

When the kids have gone – On one hand there will be void and at the same time there is opportunity to rediscover each other.

Old age – Do not make it the end. This is the time to show gratitude towards each other. And when one partner departs, relationship doesn’t end. It continues in feelings, thoughts and memories.

• Sexual desire – Not everyone has same level of sexual desire. And therefore it is very common to see frustration among partners due to this difference. There are various reasons of this difference like age, health status, stress, other priorities in life, sexual experience or it can be just individual difference. Some of these factors like stress can be worked upon.
• What do you enjoy – Every individual has unique sexuality. Get aware about what do you enjoy in sex. Communicate this to your partner but never force him or her. This could be your unique fantasy or position. You may try role play or role exchange.
• Learn to relax – Sex is fun activity. You need to relax to enjoy it. Let there be no guilt, no negativity or stress to spoil the fun.
• Make time for sex – Very crucial in modern times when people are extremely busy in their professional life and also in other obligations. At times people find it hard to take out time for quality sex. At the most it will be a quick one. Take out some time for sex and it will enhance your mental and physical health, your relationship and overall happiness.
• Spice up your surroundings – Atmosphere has big effect on quality of sex. Dull or dirty surroundings, unclean bed, room odor they all spoil the pleasure. Keep them clean and exciting. You may use music, lights and pictures to flare up the passion.
• Improve your body image – Your body is important. Make yourself physically fit and groom yourself. It is not necessary to be most handsome or most sexy but you may do your bit to be as presentable as possible.
• Try something new – Break the monotony. Plan something new like gentle massage, new position, different place. Keep it new and stimulating.
• Sex doesn’t need to be all the time – Good sex does not mean sex everyday even if you are newly married. Every couple has its own frequency that suits them. Do not succumb to pressure of proving how strong you are in this field. Mutual willingness is the key.
• Oral sex – This is something that has remained controversial. Some people love it some hate. It is safe but take caution of hygiene. And most important never force your partner into this.
• Masturbation – This can fit well into your sex life. This may help you to have your very private moment of pleasure at self will. But make sure you do not satisfy yourself so much that when it comes to your partner, you are left with no desire.
• Pills – This is not a very good way to enhance your sex life. Sex is natural and you can enhance your sex life naturally. Improve your fitness level, de-stress yourself, eat light nourishing food and do not try to be superactive in sex. There are many food items and herbs available to enhance sex life. You may also use natural therapies.

• Nutrition – Better Sex Diet can increase your sexual vitality, potency and health. Vitamin C influences a good sex life with its role in the absorption of iron, the formation of blood cells and the metabolism of the adrenal gland, all processes that affect your sex life. The vitamins in eggs can reduce performance anxiety and premature ejaculation. Foods rich in vitamin E can help improve the quality of sperm. The calcium makes orgasms more powerful.

• Exercise – Regular exercise plays a more important role in sexual satisfaction. Exercise can increase your sexual desire, help you achieve stronger orgasms and improve your endurance in the bedroom. It helps to reduce male sexual dysfunctions like erection dysfunction. Exercise also increases the levels of sex hormones in men and women.

• Manage stress – When under stress, your cortisol and adrenalin levels rise, which can interfere with sex hormones. Using stress reduction techniques, such as meditation, yoga or exercise can help reduce cortisol and adrenalin levels and allow you to enjoy sex.

• Adequate sleep – Lack of sleep can results in erectile dysfunction in men and female sexual problems. Take adequate sleep of at least 8 hours, as during the sleep some beneficial hormones are released. Getting proper rest helps to reduce stress and cope with sexual problems and better sex.

• Limit smoking and alcohol consumption – Enhance your sex life by limiting the smoking and alcohol consumption. Sexual dysfunctions can be prevented by saying NO to smoking and alcohol. This lifestyle change can lead to better sex.

• Yoga – Yoga improves orgasm. Orgasm involves rapid contractions of the pelvic floor muscles that run between the legs. In yoga, the pelvic floor muscles are known as moola bandha. Yoga strengthens them, providing benefits similar to Kegel exercises.

Sensations are crucial in experience of sex, be it touch, smell, vision and equally hearing. Our ears always wait to hear something good which can be words or music. Music has power to get you in right mood and energy.

It sets the mood

Music can help you in overcoming tiredness of body and mind of the day. It has big relaxing and soothing power. Put on the music as you allow the atmosphere to develop. Let music send invitation to your partner. Add this with small strokes like teasing eye contact or a smile. Or you can get into it as you hug each other.

Set the pace

There are all types of songs and soundtracks are available. You can choose track according to the type of mood you wish to set in. It could be slow and soft or fast and high energy. Here you must read the signals from your partner.

Message

Communication in sex is a skill. To be able to send right signal can help in getting it best. You can pick music to signal your partner the kind of mood you are in. It can be used as invitation, adding gentleness or naughtiness, to suggest actions etc.

Fantasy 

Soundtracks can also help by enhancing fantasy and setting the atmosphere on fire. You can play soundtracks and let the mental images do the trick.

Balanced diet – Like everything else, good sex needs balanced food. Right proportion of all necessary food items – carbohydrates, fats, proteins, minerals and vitamins will help the sexual organs to remain in good condition and function. It will also help in having good overall health with good energy system. A sick body can never have good sex.

Hydration – Never underestimate the importance of hydration. Your entire energy level and mood may be high or low because of this. Start your day with a glass of water and have sufficient water during the day. Eat food with rich water content. Avoid excess of tea coffee and aerated drinks.

Carbohydrates –Do not load yourself with carbohydrates. Select complex carbohydrates and balance them with proteins and necessary fats.

Proteins – Eat high quality proteins. It helps in structure and function, provides steady energy and keeps mood in good shape to avoid worn out state when you are looking for good time with your partner.

Fats–Eat essential fats as they are required for production of sex hormones. Unsaturated fats and Omega 3 fatty acids are very helpful. Saturated fats and high cholesterol are associated with poor circulation that results in poor sexual function.

Breakfast – Do not skip breakfast. It creates a negative energy balance that affects day and night.

Dinner – Avoid heavy dinner else you may end up sleeping instead of spending time with your partner. Avoid sex immediately after eating.

Choice of food – Avoid excess of heavy food and junk food. A fat body is not good for good sex both for you and your partner. It is not only looks but actually reduces libido. Eat nourishing food and in moderate quantity. Avoid heavy alcohol. It affects attention and reflexes.

Food for good sex:

Green Vegetables

Unsweetened Tea

Fruits

Eggs

Seeds and Nuts

Fatty Fish

Oatmeal and Other Whole Grains

Oysters and Other Shellfish

Dark Chocolate

Strawberries and Other Berries

Secrets why positive relationship is necessary for better sex

• Respect for each other – Building a positive sexual relationship depends very much on having a foundation of love and respect for each other
• Trust – it is extremely important. People who trust their partners feel like they know them as much as they can and that their partner will not hurt them. A must for good sex.
• Time – Good sex needs time and a good relationship will motivate you to spend more quality time with each other.
• Appreciate each other – One way to make a sexual relationship more positive is to take some time each day to appreciate the little things. When you tell someone that they look good or that they cooked a good meal, it creates a more positive environment that can set mood for good sex.
• Self esteem – Relationship will enhance your sense of belongingness and self esteem. It will help you to have good sex.
• Good communication – Good relationship will allow open communication. Ask your partner what things are really important to him or her. Turn off the TV, find a quiet room or take a walk to have important discussions. This will promote good sex.
• Physical and emotional intimacy – Physical communication is as important as emotional communication in a relationship. It relieves tension and shows your partner that you care. This is possible in good relationship and hence good sex.
• Become friends – It’s not enough to love your partner, and it’s never too late to become true companions. For best sex, couples need to genuinely like each other – to be both lovers and friends. Friendship develops from shared values and mutual empathy.

Awareness of own body

Know your body well. Be aware of your erotic zones. Masturbation increases sexual awareness and can be a powerful way to learn about your own body. For women, masturbation can help to locate the clitoris as well as other erogenous zones. Learning about your body can help you be a better lover in the future. From a young age children should come to understand its normalcy and to feel comfortable touching any part of their own body with love and tenderness.

Self care for better sex

• Increase Physical Comfort – sometimes aches and pains can make sexual activity difficult. This type of pain and discomfort may be relieved by finding a more comfortable position, using positioning devices such as pillows or a foam wedge, or soaking in a tub before sexual activity.
• Increase Intimacy & Passion in Your Relationships – it is important keep in mind the idea of relationship maintenance. There are certain things you can do to spice things up. For example, sharing new experiences has been shown to increase intimacy and therefore stimulate passion.
• Make Healthy Lifestyle Choices – Choosing not to smoke and limiting alcohol consumption can both help improve sexual health and function. Furthermore, eating a healthy diet and exercising regularly can do wonders for circulation which in turn can help to improve sexual health.

This includes:

• Do’s and don’ts of sex
• Sex habits

Read and understand to incorporate following in your sexual behavior.

• Discuss and plan – Do not think that every sex must be spontaneous. It should be discussed. This initiative is also an art. Judge the mood, the appropriateness, the timing and if fine throw a teaser. It can be as subtle as eye contact and smile. You have full right to refuse if you are not in mood but do it politely.

• Place – See the suitability of place. Will you get the privacy? Is the place ok for your partner? Make sure that you do not make it public show especially in this age when every phone has a camera.

• Hygiene – Commonest error especially by males is lack of care about hygiene. Dirty clothes, bad mouth and body odor, un-groomed appearance is sure to put off your partner. Even after the act, take care of cleanliness. Do not leave it for your partner to cleanup.

• Communication – Communication has a key role. It can enhance the pleasure or kill it. Avoid out of context talk. Avoid negative talk. Show respect to your partner even if you have to disagree, refuse or show discomfort. Use of humor is good but should not be sarcastic or to put down the other person. Do not talk about your other sexual encounters or throw negative comments to your partner.

• Attention – Keep your attention on your partner. It would be insulting if you let your mind go elsewhere. It must be conveyed that your partner is important. Keep your phone away. Similarly watching TV is not ok if it is not mutual and compliments the activity.

• Before sex – Make sure you are comfortable yourself and make your partner comfortable. Make necessary arrangements. In case you are with some new ideas, discuss beforehand. Do not jump on to your partner. Let the mood develop.

• During sex – Be graceful. You are not in a war. Do not rush or behave like Tarzan. The speed, depth and intensity of sex may vary person to person and other factors. Even then never forget it is all about sharing pleasure and happiness. Do not do anything which is not acceptable to your partner. Your mind should be alert to read the signals. Stop a particular activity and change if you see any discomfort. Understand the difference between screams of pleasure and pain. Never force hand-job or oral sex. Do not try to overdo just to prove your mastery. Support your partner. Seek willingness for use of sex toys if you like them but do not reuse them.

• After sex – Treat your partner as human being. Avoid ‘I am done’ syndrome where the moment you feel satisfied may be after orgasm, you lose interest. Even in case of mutual satisfaction, make sure you are graceful and do not jump towards your phone or TV. Take care of cleanliness. Do not throw used tissue or condoms in a manner they make publicity.

• And beyond – Sex is a private affair. Do not boast about it among others. Never use this to score a point. Making a recording and sharing is a strict no.

A sexual fantasy is a mental image or pattern of thought that stirs a person’s sexuality and can create or enhance sexual arousal. Fantasies have enormous influence over sexual behaviour and can be the sole cause of an orgasm. Many couples share their fantasies to feel closer and gain more intimacy and trust, or simply to become more aroused or affect a more powerful physical response. Fantasies are said to be an imaginary part of our minds, in which one experiences and thinks about all those things that are forbidden or impossible. They can also be said to be an advanced form of wishful thinking and they are sometimes difficult to control, when they are in an involuntary format, which generally happens when we are sleeping.

The most popular sexual fantasies among men and women involve images of sex with a passionate, attractive, exciting partner who will do whatever you want, even if that means dominating you.

Male sex fantasy

Male fantasies tend to focus more on visual imagery and explicit anatomic detail. Men are consistently found to be more interested in visual sexual stimulation and fantasies about casual sex encounters. They enjoy seeing full frontal nudity and more body parts than women. They were stimulated more by seeing genitalia and enjoyed fetish fantasies as well.

Female sex fantasy

Women are much more aroused than men by romantic words, images, and themes in films and stories. Women’s sexual fantasies include more affection and commitment. Women also like more kissing, hugging, stroking, and cuddling during sex. In short, women place the act of intercourse within a wider physical context.

Benefits of Sex Fantasy

Fantasizing can provide erotic stimulation and increase arousal fast. It can revive your sex life if it has become routine. Acting out some of your harmless fantasies can also spice up your love life. Sexual fantasy play is fun and often can be healing as well as exciting. Allowing your imagination to run free can be a wonderful experience if you have never allowed yourself to fantasize before.

Long-term sexual relationship with the same partner can get a bit boring and sexual fantasy brings back the spice and the zest in it.

There can be many more questions related to sex. And these questions are important because of the fact that sex is one of the most used, misused and abused thing today. It occupies prominent position in today’s world. Media, internet, movies are full of it. The cultures around the world differ widely. Some societies are very open and some against. There are no clear cut answers and this leads to sexual anarchy where kids are left to learn everything on their own and face consequences.

Is sex beneficial or harmful?

Sex is a very strong force like fire. It can be very beneficial as well as very harmful. It all depends on how it is used. When used sensibly with discipline in right manner, it is beneficial. It has many beneficial effects at physical, emotional, psychological and spiritual level. For understanding one may compare it with hunger. Eating food is not harmful but is necessary. Those who knows what to eat, how much to eat, when to eat and when not to eat, they are able to have good health and enjoy life. But world today is full of poor eaters who because of bad eating habits are suffering from obesity and many physical & psychological disorders including food addictions. Similarly if you are wise, have the ability of self control and know dos and don’ts of sex then you will enjoy sex, have good life and remain free from disorders & addictions. Those who do not develop self control fall for temptations and ultimately develop a sexual behavior which proves harmful at physical, psychological, social and spiritual level.

How can sex be harmful? It is natural activity. Here is the real catch. True it is natural, true it is pleasurable and true it has beneficial effects. But it is also a learned behavior. Mental appetite for sex can be increased to any levels but body has its limitations. This leads to sexual incapability and frustration. Sale of sexual drugs is a proof. Socially inappropriate behavior & sexual crimes another. Human beings have the capacity to fantasize and dwell long on sexual matters. No one can have sex with anyone whenever required. Media add to the fire. Sex sells so people are happy earning money using sex but turning themselves like sexual workers and pimps. The combination of sexual pleasure, sexual fantasy, media, lack of sex education and commercialization of sex is leading to sexual anarchy which is wrongly at times termed as sexual freedom. The ill effects of this are seen directly as well as indirectly.

The result is:

–          Physical sexual disorders

–          Psychological sexual disorders

–          Relationship discords

–          Family discords

–          Disordered personalities

–          Poor professional performance

–          Poor social behavior

–          Sex and pornography addiction

–          Sexual crimes

How much sex should be there in life?

It should be in correct proportion depending on age, health status, life circumstances and other aspects of life. Person should be sexually groomed during teenage through correct sex education. There should be no rush at premature age. Teenage sex must be avoided. With rising age one should be able to restrict to proportional level and still better sublime.  There must be good balance between mental stimulation and physical satisfaction. One should avoid artificial stimulation like watching pornography. It should not affect your physical or mental health, relationships, socialization, professional growth etc. It should not affect your time management. It should not become your only driving force in life. It should not make you do things what you otherwise would not like to do or what others abhor. It should not become the only topic your mind dwells on. You should be able to distribute your time to various aspects of life in right proportion. You should be able to indulge or avoid keeping in mind your health.

Why sex cause addiction?

Sex is a strong force. It is pleasurable, naturally driven and it is a learned behavior too. But the biggest factor in causing addiction is artificial mental stimulation like watching pornography and dwelling on sexual thoughts in addition to some risk factors like dysfunctional families or childhood abuse. Repeated mental stimulation, internal or external leads to dependence.  Since thoughts are available to any one any time any where, there is no check on it. In absence of sex education & sex discipline, the sex addiction lurks in mind unabated. To add fire, media & internet serves sex in all forms and quantity unrestricted. It is left to individual to learn and enjoy healthy sexuality.

Can sex spoil our life?

Read the possible harms of misused & abused sex. Read in everyday media about sexual harassment & sexual crimes. And this is only tip of the iceberg. A lot many harmful effects of sexual indiscipline go unnoticed. A broken relationship or family or a patient of depression may not reveal that real cause was inappropriate sexual behavior of one of the partner. Sexual inadequacy & frustration can spill over to other aspects of life. Inner discontentment and irritability may be due to sexual frustration. Kids may fall to the world of anti social elements due to pre mature sexual behavior and sex addiction. Sex can also act like distraction and can lead to lesser achievements & deviation from our wholesome growth in life. Excess sex may lead to lack of will power, self control and wisdom. And for those who are on spiritual journey, sex can be a real spoiler.

Is open sex good or bad?

Unfortunately people take open sex as freedom to have undisciplined, indiscreet and unrestricted sex which can include sex at will, multiple partners, group sex, one night stand and so on. This is not open sex. Strange but true such people are not necessarily successful sexual performers. Open sex is the open uninhibited well developed sexuality where one has no conflicts, not suffering from myths or inferiorities and has the ability and the skill to express sexuality. These are more successful sexual performers.

What is healthy sexuality?

People learn to read, write, speak, cook, drive and every other activity. But when it comes to such crucial element called sex, we develop cold feet. Sex education is still not in place. It is high time humanity learn healthy sexuality and sexual discipline. Healthy sexuality involves :

–          Right age grooming into the world of sex

–          Learning sexual responsibility

–          Learning benefits and harms of sex

–          Learning sexual discipline

–          Learning sexual etiquettes

–          Learning sexual skills

–          Incorporating sex in right proportion in life

Human beings are ready to travel in space but are still sexually illiterate. It is time for the humanity to become sexually developed, mature and graceful.

The following factors can help you in having good sex management:

• Right proportion – How much sex. Every individual has different need. And one must see need of the partner as well. It should be mutual. Also one must see the right proportion if it fits well in life with respect to work, socialization, exercise and time spent on other activities of life. If your mind and life revolves around sex then for sure it will result in disaster.

• Right time – Timing is important. You are in mood, fine but you need to see appropriateness of time as well. Things become good or ugly due to good or bad timing.

• Right place – See the appropriateness of place. Will it give you the privacy? Will it leave the tell tale marks? Sex on terrace, Sex in train, Sex in garden, Sex in office may look exciting to you but it only displays your immaturity. Your own bedroom is the best place. And when in a hotel, be sure of ‘No Camera’.

• Right person – Sex is best when it is on the foundation of a relationship of love. Paid sex, forced sex, one night stand, casual sex and similar is a sure way to create disorder of proportion and frustration.

• Right way – Right from the beginning avoid the path of sexual perversity like voyeurism, exhibitionism, sadism, masochism, pedophilia, group sex etc. Once you go into these, way out is not easy.

• Right balance – Understand the difference between mental and physical sexual appetite. Mental sexual appetite can be enormous and can be increased to any level by constantly dwelling on sex but your body has limitation. People then use artificial means like pills to match mental appetite but since that is not natural, it fails ultimately. Result is sexual weakness and frustration. Body and mind harmony is very crucial for a good sex life.

The Missionary

The most common position with man on top. Woman is lying on back.

Woman on top

The reverse of man on top.

The erotic V – in this position the woman sits down on a table edge. The man stands before it and bends his legs so he’s in the best “entering” position.

Rocking horse – In the Rocking Horse sex position he sits cross-legged and leans back supporting himself with both arms behind him. She kneels over his lap hugging him with her thighs and lowers herself down.

The padlock – She climbs onto a high piece of furniture , sits down on the edge and supports herself with the arms behind her. He stands before her and she wraps her legs firmly around his hips as he leans in to penetrate her in the Padlock sex position.

The Butterfly – She lies on her back on a suitable piece of furniture. He stands before her and she slips her legs over his shoulders. She puts her arms and hands down so she can lift her hips up while he grabs her bottom to give her added lift.

The doggy style – She’s on all fours. In order to hold her balance, she shifts her weight off her hands back towards her partner. He kneels directly behind her and holds her hips firmly to control the thrusts.

The Nirvana – this sex position is a classic. When trying the Nirvana sex position, she lies on her back, stretches her legs out and holds onto the bedposts above her head. She keeps her legs together as he enters her with his thighs outside hers.

The Reverse Cowgirl – The man lies on his back and the woman kneels over him so he can enter her. She can bob up and down supporting her weight with her hands on his thighs and he can help by lifting her hips as she moves.

A sex toy is an object or device that is said to facilitate human sexual pleasure, such as a dildo or vibrator.

Types of sex toys

• Vibrators
• Penile toys
• Glass sex toys
• Nipple toys
• Anal toys
• General penetrative toys
• Erotic furniture
• Improvised sex toys
• Erotic electrostimulation

Health and Safety concerns

Studies have reveled high level of toxins in such products. These can cause damage to the liver, lungs, kidneys, testes, hormones, reproduction and even cancer.

The Argument

Why artificial when natural is possible. And if people are talking about having more fun then it is all subjective. You may have best of the satisfaction in natural sex. More fun is a myth. The ultimate goal is satisfaction. The more artificial activities you add, you only increase your mental sexual appetite which will never get satisfied thus resulting in frustration and emptiness. So be natural and get satisfied before your body gives up.

Here are a few tips on how to achieve an improved sex life, not just for men but for their women as well. Some of these tips will include how to meet a woman’s needs, trying new positions, and how to better communicate with your partner.

Some important sex techniques for men and women are:

• Communication is one of the best sex techniques for men. Ask the woman what she likes and what she doesn’t. By asking her, she will know that you want to adapt your techniques to please her and in return she will also please you.
• Never bypass foreplay. Let the heat go up. Explore him or her top to bottom.
• When you’re in the missionary position, look at her right in the eyes and talk some dirty dialogue. when you’re talking dirty, you’ve got to do it quite breathy and in a very sexy way
• Don’t be afraid to be creative and to try new things. You need to make your relationship somehow more exciting or you’ll just bore each other.
• When a guy is on top of you in the missionary position, have him shift his body slightly forward so that, every time he thrusts, his penis rubs against your clitoris.
• Every male should learn the different erotic zones, as they are surefire triggers for stimulation. The erotic zones are areas of the female body which are the back of the knees, the feet, the nape of the neck, as well as several other areas that automatically stimulate and excite.
• Don’t be afraid to explore with your hands and lips. By not being afraid to explore her body with your hands and lips it shows her that you are desire to fully please both of you.

The most important features of tantric sexual practice revolve around the experience of subtle energies within one’s sensual embodiment, and the accessing of these energies both to enhance pleasure and to challenge our egotism into its dissolution. Thus, tantric sexuality often cultivates ecstatic consciousness as well as increased spiritual awareness of the erotic consciousness that pervades one’s human embodiment as well as everything that contextualizes this embodiment.

Tantric sexual methods may be practiced solo, in partnership, or in the sacred rituals of groups.

How to perform tantric sex

• Start by turning down the lights and shutting out the rest of the world.
• Loosen your body, shake your limbs vigorously to energise and unblock your system before you start.
• Try lying down with your partner on the floor and slowly start to touch each other, taking your time to leisurely make your way around their body.
• Try a variety of touches like firm massage, light feathery touches, and gentle stroking. Performed in the right way this can prolong sex and your pleasure for hours.
• Think about breathing. Inhale as your partner exhales and vice versa – it can help improve the connection between the two of you and keep your mind on what’s happening.

Tantra sex helps to

• Become a better lover
• Use more of your brain
• Manifest anything you want transmuting your energy
• Give & receive a greater amount of pleasure
• Learn practical concepts and tools to use every day

Couples who have brought tantric sex into their bedroom claim that the sexual techniques make for a more fulfilling relationship all round. Love-making lasts much longer the tantric way – instead of a few minutes the whole process lasts hours. And as your sexual connection with yourself and your partner deepens, your desire for sex increases and the quality of your sex life vastly improve.

A lot of Vastu and FengShui promote common sense. They talk about cleanliness, avoidance of clutter,  proper ventilation for fresh air, proper lighting, good color scheme, arrangement of furniture etc. All this is good by common sense as they improve physical and mental condition which is so necessary for good sex.

Environment

The environment in the bedroom must be supportive of good sex. Do not make your bedroom a work place or living room. It is even bad to make it a store room by having too much storage. Create your bedroom with some romantic mindset. Remember it is your love room too in addition to be used for relaxation and sleeping. So both of you must share ideas of giving it shades of love be it choice of furniture, colors on walls, curtains, lighting, paintings and art pieces, flowers and fragrance and so on.

Tips :

1. It is good to have bedroom in south, south west or south east. If it is not then see if you can keep bed in south.
2. Use bright and soothing colors on walls but individual choice is important here.
3. Keep options of both bright and dim light to suit mood.
4. Keep fresh flowers in room. This may not be a regular but atleast on special days. Make sure there is no bad smell. Therefore adjoining washroom must be clean. Fresh air is aphrodiasic in itself as is good fragrance.
5. Avoid work and work related articles in bedroom.
6. Avoid clutter and unnecessary goods.
7. It is good to avoid mirror in bedroom. But if other conditions are good then mirror can make exciting addon.
8. Avoid religious pictures and pictures of family members. Your own picture is ok.
9. It is good to have art pieces depicting love and romance. But avoid sad paintings.
10. Essential oils and candles can be used with good effect.

The first and foremost in good sex is healthy mind and healthy body. Sex is ultimate experience of mind and body and unless healthy, the experience can not be good. This is where yoga can be of great help. It can help by:

• Releasing stress
• Improving flexibility
• Improving body functions including sexual functions
• Balancing hormones including sexual hormones
• Improving concentration, alertness and mindfulness

What is Yoga?

There are two meanings of Yoga. One common is the type of some yogic postures that you can perform to gain better health and better self control. The real meaning of Yoga is deeper. It is the state of complete harmony of body mind and soul. There are different pathways to Yoga. One common is Ashtang Yoga. This is the eight step path starting from moral commitments to purity followed by yogic postures, pranayam , meditation and finally towards Samadhi which is the state of complete union with supreme consciousness.

How to learn Yoga?

It is advisable to learn Yoga from a teacher or guru. Doing it correctly is crucial.

Daily yoga positions for better sexual function:

• Moolbandh
• Bhujangasana
• Sarvangasana
• Konasana
• Halasana
• Balasana
• Pristhasana
• Rajakapotasana
• Garudasana
• AdhomukhaSavasana